Lovelorn
by CelestialFeathers999
Summary: Blessed with unmatched beauty and wealth, Megurine Luka was favoured by the heavens. Miku was merely an orphan, abandoned and unwanted. She once believed that she desired nothing more than an ordinary life, yet it all changed the moment they crossed paths. But meeting her could only be described as a tragedy, because it left Miku wanting and needing something she could never have.


"What are you thinking about?"

The voice behind her was quiet and gentle but Miku knew better. It was nothing but a façade. She had experienced this too many times, trusted too many times. She swore that she'd never let her heart be moved by _her_ again so then why…why did her chest tighten with hope?

"Oh…this isn't good," A dark chuckle sounded close to her ear, "You're supposed to be paying attention to _me_."

Retribution was swift and in mere seconds Miku found herself being pinned uncomfortably against the wall. Pain shot up her arm from where it had been roughly twisted. She barely suppressed a scream, knowing that her 'lover' hated loud pets. Yes…that was her identity now: a pet, no, worse, a possession, abused as her master saw fit.

Pale locks of hair that always reminded her of the sakura flowers in the spring tickled the sensitive skin at the nape of her neck. Miku felt slender fingers caress her bare skin slowly. She shivered involuntarily at the contact, hating her body for always reacting so strongly, hating her mind for being too weak to stay away.

Hands traced a slow and lazy pattern, from her abdomen up to her chest and then her most sensitive areas. Miku clenched her jaws so hard that she saw stars. She refused to make a sound. Not today, she wouldn't give _her_ the satisfaction today.

"You're not usually this quiet," the voice behind her almost sounded disappointed but it was the slight hint of amusement she caught that sent a bolt of fear through her, "Maybe I'll try something new today."

Teeth dug into her bare skin before she even had the time to react, to beg for forgiveness. Surprise and shock escaped her in a whimpering scream. Ever since her 'lover' had discovered how sensitive her neck area was, the spot hadn't been left alone. But none of their past rendezvous had ever involved anything like this. Her shoulder felt like it was on fire, burning where her 'lover' had torn into her delicate skin. Her eyes watered from the stinging and the one behind her seemed to take great satisfaction in that. She could feel her partner's increasing enthusiasm and excitement as her back was fervently decorated with kisses.

"N-no…n-not th-there," Miku's voice cracked as she protested against the uncomfortable sucking feeling on her neck. She wanted to yell and curse but all she could muster was a weak cry.

"Hm? You're mine and the whole world's going to know it," the voice hardened in displeasure at her resistance, "You have no choice."

Miku shuddered as the one behind her resumed licking and biting at her neck. She'd had enough of these encounters to know that it would leave a mark, or multiple.

She had school tomorrow. An immense feeling of dread rose from the pit of her stomach at the thought. The rumours were bad enough already, without 'evidence' to further fuel her classmates' gossip.

" _Look at Hatsune, she's always so poorly dressed. How'd she manage to get into_ our _school?"_

" _Didn't you know? She's being_ sponsored _." A knowing glance, a few giggles._

" _Might as well just be a prostitute at this point. All this education's going to waste on her anyways."_

Then the group of girls had walked away, laughing and darting mocking glances her way when they thought she wasn't looking.

But of course, these weren't things she could explain to her 'lover' and she neither expected nor wanted sympathy from someone like _her_. After all, she had already gotten what she wanted from this deal of theirs. Only a few years more of pain and torture and she'd hopefully be granted a scholarship to somewhere far away, maybe even overseas. Although in moments like these, Miku found it hard to believe that she had a future at all.

Shamefully, pleasure was mounting in her body, building with every stroke of her 'lover's' fingers. She felt animalistic sounds rise from her throat, which prompted her partner to go even faster. Seeing Miku lose herself to her carnal instincts had always been something _she_ enjoyed. Almost too soon, it was over, dispersing in waves that resonated through her very core. She felt a familiar sleepiness settle in on her but she knew far better than to let herself rest.

Pressure lifted from her back and Miku rubbed her shoulder gingerly, recoiling in pain as she massaged the sore muscles. Her 'lover' had already leaned back against the pillows, looking regal and beautiful as always. An amused smile tugged at the corners of her mouth, although it didn't seem to reach her cold blue eyes, they never did.

"Pleasure me." The voice commanded yet again and Miku could do nothing but obey. Dully, she repeated the memorized routines of what her 'lover' enjoyed the most. When the both of them had been satisfied, Miku collapsed in a mixture of pain and exhaustion.

Resentment seeped through her bones at the feeling of a hand stroking her head. There were many things she hated about this arrangement but moments like these had to be the worst. Because without seeing her face or hearing her voice, she could almost believe that the tender caresses came from care and affection. And deep down, she didn't want to admit that this was what she had desired the most. She didn't want to be reminded that she had fallen in love with a woman by the name of Megurine Luka.

* * *

The one before her had been Rin; Kagamine Rin, her friend, confidant and sister of sorts.

Miku still remembered the day, at the tender age of five, when Rin had been introduced to the rest of the kids at the orphanage, eyes red from crying and barely able to stand. Even after the young girl was sent to the Kagamine House, seven-year-old Miku remained curious. Abandoned at birth, she had been there her whole life, along with the other children of the Hatsune House but she had never seen a foreigner before. Miku wondered if the newcomer hailed from 'England' or one of the other fancy European countries their caretaker read to them about before nap time. During meals and whenever they were free, Miku would seek out Rin. The young girl was quiet at first but slowly, they grew close and bit by bit, Rin broke out of her shell.

* * *

At ten years old, Rin could already be called beautiful. Golden hair and turquoise eyes, with features beginning to show elegance, but not even her beauty could escape her reputation. The blonde had been adopted multiple times before, exquisite as she was, but her foster parents never lasted more than a month. Every time the girl was returned, Miku would berate her for _'ruining her chances at normal life again'_ and Rin would smile cheekily and stick out her tongue.

' _I'd rather stay here with you anyways.'_ She'd say and Miku could only smile back, unable to deny the obvious relief that she felt at Rin's every return.

By the time Rin turned thirteen and Miku, fifteen, the blonde had become quite a notorious problem child and her looks no longer fooled anyone into adopting her. Even the staff at the orphanage had resigned to put her through schooling until they could finally be rid of her as an adult. They fought a lot that year. Rin's rebellious tendencies had only gotten worse since childhood and Miku worried for her friend.

It used to be running away for a few days at a time to explore the city or dressing up as a beggar to incite pity out of people on the streets for pocket money. Then it had turned into lock picking and shoplifting little things. None of that was as bad as what she did now. Early in the year, Rin had run into a motley group of teens in one of the many shady back alleys of their city. It was a colourful mix of ages, ranging from twelve to nineteen. They taught the blonde how to smoke and drink. The little gang also got into fights often and it wasn't a rare occurrence for Rin to come back bruised and smelling like a junkie off the streets.

Their caretakers usually turned a blind eye to these little details, finding it much easier to let Rin do whatever she pleased rather than try to discipline the stubborn child. Miku often found herself playing the role of the guardian and begging Rin to go to class with her. Her lectures fell on deaf ears, however and each discussion became more heated as both sides began to lose patience.

' _Stop telling me what to do! You're not my mom!'_ Rin yelled at her one day, eyes brimming with tears. Miku could only watch in silence as the blonde ran off. She knew that all these acts of defiance were only a way of coping. Even after all these years, the memories of her life before the orphanage still weighed heavily on her mind. Rin had told her that she never considered those on the streets her friends and that she would stop when she got bored. Miku only feared that the blonde would be badly hurt, or worse, dead, by the time that day came.

* * *

Rin didn't return for three days. And when she finally reappeared, it was with much fanfare and enigma. Escorted by a black car that was probably worth more than the orphanage that housed them, the blonde had been personally greeted by the head of staff.

The man who drove her back wore a crisp suit and his mannerisms made it evident that he was part of a much higher class in the social ladder. Rin seemed unhurt, other than the light bandages around her head, which were quickly discarded as soon the driver left. Mutual relief coloured their cheeks at the sight of each other and the two hugged tightly.

Within days, the light cut on Rin's forehead had healed without a trace but Miku became increasingly unsettled. The blonde had been quite boisterous ever since she overcame her shyness but after her return, Rin transformed into an obedient lamb. She quietly did what she was told and even went to school. Secret excursions to the slums turned into study sessions and while Miku was glad that the blonde had her life back on track, she hated that Rin never confided in her anymore.

The blonde rarely talked to her after the incident, or anyone, really. Often, Miku noticed that same black car coming to pick up Rin, sometimes from school, sometimes from their orphanage. When asked, the younger girl would either stay silent or avoid the question altogether. The withdrawn Rin made Miku almost miss the days when she'd run wild in the streets. Back then, she had been so frank and vocal about her intentions, a little jarring in her honesty perhaps, but invigorating to be around nonetheless. Now, Rin was a mere husk of her former self. Her eyes held a dull gloom that Miku couldn't seem to understand, much less lift. She could only watch helplessly as the blonde sank further into despair, hoping that one day, they could be as close as they used to be.

On a blustery winter evening, Rin finally gave the confession that Miku was looking for, although it left her with more questions than answers.

' _I'm seeing someone,'_ Rin bit her lip and kept scanning the area around them warily. She had dragged Miku all the way out to the abandoned old playgrounds without an explanation. It was absolutely freezing and certainly, no one but them would be crazy enough to stay outside. Still, the blonde was nervous and on edge.

' _What do you mean?'_ Miku managed through chattering teeth, unable to believe that romance was the only reason for Rin's drastic change in temperament.

' _No…no that was phrased wrongly. I'm not seeing her. It's not that sort of a relationship. She said that…that…'_ The blonde began pacing back and forth out of frustration, shaking her head and muttering incoherent sentences.

' _Rin, it's okay. Just tell me everything. Trust me,'_ Miku grabbed her friend firmly by the shoulders and held onto her in a tight hug. The younger girl fell silent in her arms, shaking from the wind and the tiny sobs that ran through her body. It was a while before she was calm enough to speak again.

' _Remember the three days when I disappeared? I…met someone during that time. She…saved me and promised me everything I've been looking for...under the condition that I…'_

Miku waited for the blonde to continue but silence stretched between them like an impenetrable fog.

' _Rin?'_ She prompted gently, rubbing comforting circles on the blonde's back, _'What did she ask for?'_

' _My…that I…'_ Rin's words died in her throat, _'I can't tell you,'_ the younger girl whispered hoarsely.

' _Okay…that's alright,'_ Miku coaxed, _'Can you at least tell me who it is?'_

' _No! I…I can't tell you that either! Anything but that…!'_ Agitated at the question, the blonde squirmed out of the embrace.

' _W-why…'_ Miku's throat felt constricted. She was breaking at seeing her friend like this. What stung her heart even more was that Rin didn't trust her.

' _Y-you…I might put you in danger like that…i-it's best you don't know anything about her,'_ the blonde whimpered, hugging her arms close and looking forlorn and miserable in the snow, _'Th-this was a mistake. I sh-shouldn't have called you out here…it's all my fault. My fault…always…'_

Before Miku could say a word in protest, Rin had run off, disappearing quickly into the darkness.

The distance between them only grew after that. In fact, the blonde seemed to be actively avoiding her. Miku would be lucky to catch a glimpse of the girl outside of school. Her heart sank as she slowly gave up on repairing their friendship.

* * *

A few weeks before Rin's fourteenth birthday, her body was found, frozen, at the foot of a bridge. 'Truly a tragedy,' the papers reported, 'she must've slipped on the ice.' The police ruled it an accident.

Media blew up at the death of such an angelic-looking girl. To pass away cold and alone during the festive period that prefaced Christmas, the story tugged at people's heartstrings. Tearjerkers were often the best at gathering much-needed publicity and journalists capitalized on that. For a while, a controversial article that suggested foul play even circulated, reaching substantial popularity before being deleted and dismissed as mere conjecture. Attention was then quickly pushed onto Rin's background and, in extension, the orphanage. The children found their quiet lives turned upside down by frequent visits from the press.

Through all the chaos, Miku could only feel numb disbelief. A dull pain throbbed in her frostbitten heart at the thought of Rin being gone forever. Yet she couldn't shake the ominous feeling that it was bound to happen and despite official statements, she was certain that her friend's death was connected to the woman she mentioned; the one who had saved her. She had no leads, no proof, nothing but the overwhelming belief that weighed heavy in her gut. Grieving was a silent and gruelling process.

The funeral took place ironically on Rin's birthday, only two days after Christmas. Funded by many different parties, it was an elaborate event, more than what an average orphan could ever expect. Among the many donors, one stood out the most: Megurine. A majority of financial support had come from that name.

It seemed that the story had not only moved the public but also attracted the attention of the renowned Corporation that held what was practically a monopoly in multiple industries. The conglomerate had immeasurable wealth and power at its disposal. Bearing a legacy passed down through the generations, the inner workings of the Megurine family were a mystery and rumours of underhanded tactics were often speculated. That being said, any lawsuits against them were quickly dropped. There weren't many who could withstand the consequences of indicting such a family in court; those influential enough to do so chose to side with them, finding more profit in cooperation rather than opposition.

It was snowing hard that day, as if the very heavens mourned Rin's death. Miku and the other children stood, shivering in their freshly made dress clothes, and watched the obsidian coloured casket lower into the ground. The priest that they hired rambled on about life and death. Miku had long since stopped paying attention. _Most of these people don't care for Rin in the least_ , she thought bitterly. They were clearly here to gain the public's favour.

The eulogy dragged on as snow began to pile on the unburied casket. Miku just wanted it to end. The priest paused again, looking across the audience with fake tears in his eyes. Suddenly, the man's face paled by several shades and his mouth dropped open in a way that contradicted his wise persona. He stumbled away from the podium, almost dropping the book he had been reading from. His eyes were fixated on a spot behind the audience.

Miku, along with most of the guests present, turned around out of curiosity. Her heart jumped at seeing a certain black car parked in front of the gates. A familiar suited man exited and walked to the back to open the door respectfully.

She lost her breath at the sight of the woman who stepped out. Even with a disdainful expression plastered on her face, she was still easily the most beautiful person Miku had ever laid eyes on. Like the very incarnation of some goddess, she descended down the aisle and gently brushed the snow away from the top of Rin's casket, as if giving her a blessing.

Something scratched uncomfortably at the back of Miku's mind. She had definitely seen this stunning stranger before, either on television or in the newspapers. She didn't usually have access to either, however and the name she was looking for escaped her.

' _A-apologies milady, I d-didn't know you'd be-'_ The priest almost shook with fear as he addressed the woman, who silenced him with a wave of her hand.

' _Save your words. I'll be leaving now.'_ Her voice was quiet and monotone, as she swept her gaze disapprovingly across the whispering audience.

Miku sat and stared, immobilized with shock. The soft pink hair, the cerulean eyes and the way her lips and cheek flushed delicately…everything about her was so mesmerizing.

 _No…no this can't be happening_ , she cursed herself for being helpless to stop the rising feeling in her chest. It was a strange pulsating sensation, like something inside her had clicked the moment she saw the woman. The world fell away around her and nothing but the goddess in front of her seemed to matter.

She had never felt such intense self-loathing before either. To be so enraptured by a stranger when the body of her friend lay mere meters before her, she was worse than a beast. Still, she was unable to pull her eyes away.

Then it happened. A shock ran through her body as stormy irises bore into her. She was terrified, yet so completely enthralled as she stared into the cold blue depths of the stranger's eyes. Adrenaline filled her and screamed at her to run away, for the gaze spoke of imminent danger, yet she felt nothing but the overwhelming desire to get as close as possible. So she stayed still and shakily held eye contact.

 _The…one…R…n…me..ion..ed._ A thought surfaced above the static that saturated her mind. _The…one…the one…the one Rin mentioned. It had to be her._

Miku's breathing became increasingly short and ragged as the realization dug into her numbed senses. The woman tore her gaze away and left with elegant strides, her face betraying no emotions. Hot tears spilled onto Miku's frozen cheeks as the pink-haired stranger left her field of vision and the world spun back into focus.

She felt her heart hammer painfully in her chest. The priest returned to delivering the rest of the eulogy and the guests assumed their previous state of half-listening. All appeared normal and yet Miku knew that it was far from over.

Because from the moment their eyes met, her life and her very destiny had been inexorably altered.

* * *

Barely two weeks after the funeral, Miku was called to see the head of the orphanage. She hadn't been a particularly exceptional child so it was her first time meeting the man personally. As soon as she stepped into his office, he was all smiles and caring words, the epitome of a father figure. Miku felt disgust rising in her throat, knowing that the head really couldn't care less about her. For him, the orphanage was nothing more than a responsibility that he had been forced to carry. His displeasure at the fact manifested in housing that lacked renovation and harsh punishments for anyone who broke one of the many rules. Someone else stood at the back of the room, someone wearing a suit that Miku had never wanted to see again. The head's furtive glances to the other man had not gone unnoticed.

' _Oh, my heart! Little Miku's all grown up,'_ the head cooed and she tried to not puke as he patted her head 'lovingly', _'I don't want to let you go either hon, but a great future awaits you!'_

Miku filtered out the rest of his babbling but the gist of it was clear. She would no longer be living at the orphanage. By some 'miraculous opportunity' as the head put it, she was transferring to the top private school in the country, an elite academy four hours away by car. That was the official reason she was moving away, because it would be too much of a hassle to commute every day.

Miku knew it had to be more than that. The golden opportunity that had seemingly fallen from the sky smelled of conspiracy. Even if someone wanted to sponsor a child to go to school, they had no reason to choose her of all people. She was neither the most promising student nor one that had enough time left to become excellent. Of course, it had been explained as a lottery case but luck rarely struck in such coincidental ways.

Her rationalizations were swept aside as the suited man offered a hand to her. He hadn't spoken at all the entire time, only nodded and smiled silently. Miku took deep breaths and tried to calm down as they made their way towards the exit. Her meagre possessions had already been packed and were waiting for her by the door. Worrying was no use now. She couldn't escape from someone like that and she wasn't sure she even wanted to. After all, without Rin, there was nothing left for her in that place. Perhaps it really would be better to take this opportunity and make the best of it. With luck, she might even find out the truth behind what had happened to her friend. And so, without a second glance, Miku left behind the only home she'd ever known.

The pink-haired woman was waiting for her inside the car, sculpted features appearing even more flawless up close. She smiled and yet Miku shivered. Her eyes were frosty chips of ice, sharp and cruel.

' _I have a deal for you,'_ she said in a soft and pleasant voice, although her tone suggested that refusal was not an option, _'In exchange for money, you will be mine.'_

* * *

"I don't recommend it, milady," the purple haired man sipped his coffee calmly, unfazed by the smouldering gaze of the irate woman in front of him, "Our stocks in your department have already went down quite a bit this quarter. Many investors are demanding to know why. I doubt your father would approve of you taking more time off to…play with your toys."

"Excuse me?" anger swirled behind the narrowed blue eyes, "Don't you _dare_ tell me what to do!"

Accustomed to her short temper, the man expertly avoided the gold paperweight aimed at his head.

"I would never dream of doing that, milady," He bowed respectfully, although he couldn't help but allow his voice to take on a slightly mocking tone. Others may fear her wealth and power or covet her beauty but he had been by her side for too many years to see her as anything but the spoiled brat she was inside. His lips pulled into a tiny smirk as his sarcasm made her fume even more. It was endlessly amusing to him. "I am merely suggesting a course of action to ensure the most favourable outcome. A good attitude wouldn't hurt either."

"Don't act like you know everything about me, Kamui," the pink haired woman seethed and continued to stare daggers into her advisor, "Do as you're told and inform my father of my absence."

"As you wish milady," Kamui walked towards the desk and paused in front of the phone, "Although if I may say one last thing, I hope you haven't forgotten about Miss Rin."

"Is that a threat, Kamui?" He could feel her eyes boring into his back with murderous intent, "I'm not a fool. I know that girl's real identity and I know father's close with Avadonia. If this is the message he wanted you to send then he should know that I'd recognize his tactics anywhere. Tell him that he better not interfere with this one."

"The girl was barely thirteen. The scandal that would've caused and the damage to your reputation…" the man pursed his lips, not liking her disrespectful tone, "Your father only wants the best for you, milady."

"The best for me? Don't make me laugh," the pink haired woman let out a harsh chuckle, "I know how he likes to deal his cards and his connections with…certain organizations. In fact, I could probably even name who he hired to-"

"I don't know what you're implying milady," Kamui interjected smoothly, indifferent to the fact that he'd further infuriated her with the interruption, "It was truly a tragic accident. But someone who agreed to such a contract was not fit to be in your presence in the first place. Truly a distasteful child."

"No more distasteful than a lapdog such as yourself," the pink haired woman spat back. Out of all those who served her, he was probably the only one who could speak to her this way and get away with it. If it weren't for her parents' favour of the man, she'd have done away with him a long time ago.

Kamui barely flinched at the biting insult and merely returned to making the call as he was ordered to. Harsh words and threats were nothing new when he worked beside the one and only Megurine Luka.

Incomparable beauty and limitless wealth were connected with that title. It was said that there was not a man in the world who didn't desire her and the power she held, although none dared to approach. The heiress to the Megurine legacy was notorious for her unpredictable temperament and eccentric tastes, to the point where many preferred to admire from afar.

Kamui sighed and waited for the call to connect. If it hadn't been for Yuuma's insistence that his daughter be guided by someone trusted, he would much rather not deal with this overly entitled child.

"You may leave now," Her simmering gaze was still trained on him, even after he had delivered the message. The words were polite but it was clearly more of an command than a request. Knowing that he shouldn't test her limits any further, Kamui bowed again and retreated from the room.

Luka waited until she heard the metallic click of the door closing to fling the crystal penholder across the room. It shattered into jagged little pieces, much to her satisfaction. She felt her anger subside enough to examine the damage done. Her office was a mess, with her desk jarringly empty on one side and half her possessions smashed into a corner of the room.

The pink haired woman shrugged and took a deep breath, grabbing an empty glass off the extravagantly gilded shelf. Some staff would come in and clean this place up overnight and her desk possessions would be replaced in less than a week. Then, in another month, they'd be destroyed again via being thrown at a certain purple haired man. It always ended like this after talking to Kamui. She tightened her grip on the glass. Even thinking about him was irritating. She was more than old enough and capable enough to need a babysitter like him. There was nothing she hated more than feeling like her every move was being monitored and judged. Yet that seemed to be exactly what her father wanted. He even had to ruin her entertainment. Rin may have been merely a toy but the girl was still _hers_. And no one messed with Megurine Luka's possessions. For Kamui to even have the audacity to mention that girl…

Luka slammed the glass down on the table as rage bubbled within her. Pouring herself a considerable amount of the expensive wine that she'd been gifted earlier, the pink haired woman took a sip, savouring the strange taste. She'd never really liked wine or alcohol in general. But being the heiress to a corporate empire meant formal banquets and social gatherings, both of which came with plenty of drinks. From the finely aged nectar, meant for the most sophisticated palette to the kind of liquor one could make in a bathtub, Luka had slowly tasted it all. Somewhere along the way, she found herself more and more attached to not the flavour but the effect. Taking a few sips always made it easier to drown out the cumbersome world around her and the never ending stream of people who wished to gain her favour. Their faked sincerity and calculated words disgusted her. These people convinced her that human connection meant nothing. She much preferred to trust in things that money could buy.

The one who had really driven that point home had been a woman with short brown hair. She was what? Some sort of minor celebrity? A model? Luka couldn't quite remember. All she knew was that her name was Meiko and she had almost lost her heart to that woman.

' _I can show you things you've never experienced before.'_ Her smile had been so alluring and her touch just felt so _right_. Luka remembered being tired of the tedious meetings with suitors, men who had devoured her with their eyes like she was a piece of meat. The worst of them made no move to hide the fact that they were after either her body or her inheritance or both. She never exchanged anything more than a few glances and some polite words with them but it still made her feel so violated. Meiko had been a blatant act of defiance, a declaration to the world. Of course, it didn't help that the woman had actively seduced her, made her feel so _loved_.

She had almost believed that for once in her life, someone saw her for herself; not as some heiress or desirable object, just as Luka, a woman with human needs and desires like any other. For that, she didn't mind that Meiko wasn't a man, didn't mind that her lover always asked for money. None of that mattered if it meant she had found the one person in the world destined to stand at her side. Of course, all of it had been a lie. It was impossible to fathom just how far she had fallen to have wished to throw away her inheritance just to elope with some woman. But money had been the bargaining chip all along and she was the only one blind to it. The moment she had gotten what she wanted out of their relationship, the one named Meiko disappeared without a trace, leaving with the remnants of Luka's naivety.

She took a bigger sip of the sour liquid, relishing in the familiar warmth that began to fill her limbs and the comfortable buzzing in her mind. It had been a blur after that woman. Her more tender emotions were cast away, much to the pleasure of her father. Cruelty and indifference were valuable advantages in the business world. The more social standing she gained, the less she felt like a person. She didn't mind either, really. It was much better like this, dead and unfeeling.

She had many others after Meiko left: A dancer with short green hair, a blonde idol, a lively university student with red tresses…she couldn't recall any of their names after all this time. No one stood out to her anymore and certainly, none gave her what she was looking for. She didn't even know exactly what it was that she wanted but she could distinctly feel herself growing more and more distant from her goal with every effort…not that it mattered. In fact, it was better this way, knowing that there was nothing but a cold, hard contract between her and her lovers. People easily betrayed each other, but it seemed that none betrayed money.

Five years had passed since and countless women came and went, some even had beauty that rivalled her own. Many of them clearly had feelings beyond what the terms of their contract required, yet Luka could never bring herself to care. She never had to try to get people's interest after all. Quiet rejections and ones that ended in screaming or tears, she'd been through it all. Slowly, it became a dull habit, an unshakable routine. But she did still find some form of amusement from observing others' emotions. Perhaps it was because she never felt anything worthwhile anymore but it was interesting to dangle people's dreams in front of them and watch hope and despair fight each other in their eyes.

Luka sighed and downed the rest of her drink and without a pause, she filled the glass again.

Rin had been a bit different from the rest.

It had almost been a year since the day she found the girl, lying unconscious on the streets, looking like she had come out of the losing end of a fight. Which was probably exactly what had happened, seeing as the area was known for gang activity. The skirmish had likely ended with that nasty gash on the blonde's head and the two sides dispersing out of fear that the girl was dead.

Normally, she would've ignored such a thing but something stood out to her about the frail teen. Dirty and scruffy as she was, Luka could still tell that her features were quite delicate and angelic in a way. So she ordered her driver to stop and call a private ambulance to take the girl to the closest hospital sponsored by her family. Rin had been treated in the ward reserved for relatives of the Megurine household and special guests. In the two days it took for the blonde to wake up, she had the girl's identity thoroughly investigated. The results were delivered promptly. After all, there was no information that she couldn't get her hands on.

Avadonia had not been a name she expected to see in the report. All she really knew about the family was that they were the Megurine Corporation's largest overseas partner. Based in England, the two business giants had not only close financial ties but also familial ones. Members of the respective households often intermarried to strengthen their relationship and pool their wealth, in arrangements not unlike royal betrothals. Luka herself had once been considered for an engagement to Allen, the upcoming heir that matched her in social status. However, Leon Avadonia was notoriously protective of his son and she was not the least bit interested in marriage so it had been called off, much to both sides' relief.

Although her father remained close with Leon, Luka had never liked the man. Seeing the name Avadonia printed on the documents about Rin had been quite a juicy bit of dirt on him. It must have been the fates' strange sense of humour that brought the girl to her. Kagamine Rin was her registered name but before that, she had been Riliane Avadonia, Allen's unwanted twin. Abandoned in a place far from home, with the help of the Megurine family, the blonde's 'orphaning' had been the result of Leon, her paranoid father's, fear that her very existence would threaten his son's claim to the company. There was no way Luka could've let such an interesting one go.

Sure, the girl was a little young, perhaps the youngest out of all the lovers she'd had, but in terms of physical attractiveness, she already surpassed the majority of people Luka had contracted. Not to mention, there was something refreshing about her troubled innocence and the secrets she wanted to withhold from the rest of the world, secrets that Luka now knew.

When the girl woke up, it was much too simple to leverage her. Young and unstable, it was all too easy to see what answers Rin was after and what kind of attention she sought. It was almost…joyful to play with her. The blonde had been one of the few who was neither interested in money or Luka herself, only information that she reached for with relentless vigour. Of course, she could've never gotten what she wanted. The odds were rigged against her from the very beginning, something the teen was well aware of. Yet she continued to hold on with a determination that was rare in even the most elite kind of people Luka had met in her lifetime. Seeing such strength from a young girl with virtually nothing was an eye opener. It was even more entertaining to feed her bits of information at a time and watch her struggle, wondering when she would finally break.

She had been out of the country on a business trip when it happened. Letting that journalist snap a picture of them together had been her fault, she supposed. She had been careless, a little too distracted by her new plaything. Amidst everything, she had forgotten the kind of position she held and the prying eyes of those around her. Furthermore, Rin's identity was much too precarious. The kind of attention that being with Luka brought her was very much unwanted, especially when Leon still regularly talked with Yuuma.

Her death should have never come as a surprise. But the feeling of loss had been stark in her mind all the same. It wasn't anything like sadness or grief, not even close, but it was definitely a frustrating emotion. She felt like a predator, whose prey had been snatched away from right under her nose. And even if it had been her father who had ordered it, such a thing was still unforgivable. For someone so detached, the echoing sentiment threatened to drive her insane, to the point where she had cancelled the rest of her meetings and flew back to see Rin's casket with her own eyes.

Disappointment left a bitter taste and the little audience gathered for the girl had been pathetic in her eyes. The journalist who caught them together had been bribed into silence. Manipulating the media was also a classic tactic. Her father never did anything halfway. What had surprised her, however, was the faint stirring in her chest when her gaze connected with the vibrant teal irises belonging to one of the many children who had been at the funeral.

The girl looked no older than sixteen, a little tall and clearly still in the gangly and awkward phase of puberty. Her face was nothing special; innocent, with cheeks still rounded from baby fat, a small nose and lips that weren't quite full. Although her teal hair stood out among the crowd, her features were plain and nothing out of the ordinary. But her eyes, the lively blue-green orbs, wide from shock and what could only be described as a love-struck gaze, they caught her attention.

Perhaps it was the circumstances of their meeting but the girl strangely reminded her of Rin. They were nothing alike. Where the blonde had been exotic and unique, the teal haired girl seemed to blend easily into the crowd. Rin's eyes had been sharp and alert, a little too perceptive for her age, while this girl still had the look of a child, despite being older. Luka hadn't seen such naivety in a long time.

When she walked away, it wasn't difficult to keep her well-practiced poker face although she was beginning to feel a new kind of excitement. She'd had her share of gorgeous and experienced women. It would be a nice change to taste something new. Making a mental note to have it arranged, Luka wondered how soon this one would break. Quickly, she mused in her mind. And then she'd have to look for someone else. Or at least that's what she had thought.

The glass was empty again. The pink haired woman glared at the crystal object as if it were the cause of all her troubles. Despite how often she consumed alcohol nowadays, she never really seemed to have developed any sort of resistance to the toxic indulgence. Her body was already beginning to feel heavy and her mind was sluggish. Three was usually her limit and she'd had two. Luka didn't hesitate to refill her glass with the swirling crimson beverage.

How different Miku had turned out to be from what she had imagined. No matter what tricks and experiments Luka subjected her to, a passionate flame burned behind the teal orbs that had first captivated her. Nothing seemed to snuff out the hope that the teen held. In what, Luka could never really figure out. She was more resilient than all those before her. Even grown women with vast amounts of social experience had trouble enduring the mind games Luka liked to play. Yet Miku faced all of it with a quiet strength. No matter what emotions were manipulated, fear, desire and even love…if it weren't for her increasing silence, Luka would've almost thought her to be immune to emotional torture.

But she was breaking. Slowly, but surely, the girl was falling apart right in front of her eyes. The notion intrigued Luka even more. She'd have never thought that such an average girl would hold her interest like this. She almost didn't want to see her fall further, almost.

Picking up her phone lazily, she dialled an overused number, cursing when her fingers kept hitting the wrong keys.

"I…ll be out sooon. Pick up that…that giirl on your way here." Her words slurred a little but if the man on the end questioned it, he didn't voice his concern.

"Understood." His voice was thin and borderline hoarse but his tone was unwaveringly obedient.

It was for this very reason that Luka had chosen Piko to be her driver. He always took orders without question and executed them without fail. She enjoyed the feeling of absolute authority his quiet nature gave her. In fact, if it weren't for the occasional words he uttered, she'd have thought him to be mute and Luka was very much fine with that. People around her always talked too much.

She took one last swig from the glass and launched it at the pile of broken items, sending it to its grave. Unsteadily, she stood up from her leather chair and struggled to put on her coat, trying to ignore the disorienting blurring of her vision. The clumsiness was annoying but also calming. It gave her an excuse to not mind her actions or her words as much as she always did. The lightness in her head almost made her feel free enough to let herself go but that was something she could never afford to do. So she settled for the fuzzy warmth spreading within her, swaying slightly as she stumbled towards the door.

* * *

Miku had a sinking feeling in her gut the moment the white haired man interrupted her class, attracting her classmates' and teacher's absolute attention as he quietly asked for her. Hurriedly, she stuffed the textbook she had open into her bag and scurried towards the door, embarrassment bright on her cheeks. It wasn't the first time this had happened but she could never get used to the attention placed on her. Some girls in the front row giggled and whispered as she passed them. That was nothing new and rather easy to ignore.

Before she climbed into the car, Piko grabbed her arm and gave it a light squeeze. She returned a weak smile to the man's stoic face, letting him know that she understood. It was how he always warned her when _she_ was in one of her moods. Miku's premonition had been correct. She watched as he slid into the driver's seat, wordlessly as usual. The only one who ever showed her any semblance of kindness anymore was him. Ironically, she had been scared of the white haired man at first but he was more compassionate than his perpetually apathetic expression would suggest. Now, she could only be grateful for what little comfort his presence still managed to offer her.

The first thing Miku noticed was the stench of alcohol that accompanied Luka as she crashed into the front seat. The sharp smell attacked her sensitive nose and she felt a rising sense of dread at what was waiting for her. She was always rougher with Miku when intoxicated.

No one spoke but the tension in the air was palpable.

Miku shrunk into the backseat a little more, rubbing at the wound in her shoulder. Her body hadn't fully recovered from their last meeting and soreness persisted in every single one of her muscles. Now it was going to start again.

A little voice whispered at the back of her mind. She wanted this, didn't she? How many star-crossed lovers had there been in history? So tragically praised in literature? How many would die at the chance to be beside the one they loved? Miku was lucky enough to have the very thing those people couldn't grasp, even with their dying breath. In a twisted way, she should feel happy, shouldn't she? Even if that love could never be requited, just being at her side, _serving_ her, was more than what she could ever hope for.

Bitter anger manifested at the thought as her restless side screamed at her. Why should she ever resign herself to be enslaved by that terrible woman? No matter how clichéd and dramatic her desires were, a part of her was also certain that she hated Luka. It was inevitable really. Someone like her, born with a silver spoon in her mouth, someone who treated emotions like toys and human lives like property, how could she fall in love with someone so ugly? It would be shallow to say that it was physical beauty alone that had ensnared her. But perhaps, she was just that shallow of a person. She couldn't understand herself at all.

Miku swallowed her tears and apologized to Rin in her mind. It was getting easier to forget that this was the woman related to her death and she was losing the will to find out the truth. She badly wanted something. Love? Attention? An easy life? She couldn't see it anymore.

The teal haired girl took a deep breath and steeled herself as they pulled up in front of the apartment complex. Piko escorted them up the private elevator to the penthouse, before leaving her alone with Luka.

She winced as an iron grip formed around her wrist. That was going to leave a bruise for sure. She wasn't even given time to take off her shoes or jacket before being roughly shoved onto the couch. Her kisses were like the rest of her movements, sloppy and much too forceful. Miku fought down disgust as she moved to undress the woman on top of her. It was the right response most of the time, as she had quickly learned through many trials that had often ended with physical abuse to her body. Yet this time, her hand was stopped as she reached to unclasp the lacy black bra that poked out from under Luka's blouse.

Her heart thumped erratically, wondering if she had done something wrong. The pink haired woman was one to punish her for no reason other than because it suited her desires in the heat of the moment. Miku could never predict those bouts of cruelty, not that the pain was avoidable anyways.

To her surprise, Luka neither yelled nor hit her. Instead, she sat back on the couch and leaned against the padding. Her eyes were dull and wandered too much, a side effect of inebriation.

"I…want to talk today."

Miku stared at her in silent shock, unsure if she'd heard correctly. Since when had their relationship been one built on civilized communication?

"About anything…really…you can…ask me anything…there must be something you really want to know…right? Something….only…I can answer…"

She was mumbling almost incoherently. Miku refused to move, wary that this was another one of her games. Expose her and make her show emotion, then break her utterly and completely… _that_ was something Luka liked to do. But she didn't usually seem so…lost. A curious thought stirred at the back of her dulled mind. This could be her chance.

"Then…then I want to ask about…I want to know…" Miku stalled with her words as she put a safe distance between them, in case she said the wrong thing. It would hurt less if he could dodge the first blow, "What was your relationship with…Kagamine Rin?"

Silence followed.

Then a flash of anger in the cold blue eyes that had previously been unfocused.

Miku stumbled backwards reflexively, supporting herself with the armchair she had almost tripped over. The pink haired woman didn't seem interested in chasing her, however and merely glared.

"Why…why are all of you…talking about her today…" She growled, voice low and uncharacteristically shaky. Then she cleared her throat and took a deep breath. "You should forget about her. She was someone you could never have saved."

"What do you know about her? Please…I…!" Miku couldn't understand what came over her, the sudden rage and courage that spilled forth in a slew of uncontrollable words. She should be scared. Terrified. Her life could end with a wave of the pink haired woman's hand and yet she couldn't help but demand answers. If she were to die, looking for the truth…if she were to die, on the command of someone she loved…well, she didn't exactly mind. She had to be strong. She had no one else now. She had to be…

Luka was staring at her with a strange expression on her face. In anyone else, Miku would recognize it as a tender gaze but not her. Megurine Luka never showed kindness. It must be all in her mind. Numbly, she realized that tears had spilled over, warm as they flowed down her cheeks. She did nothing to stop them, or wipe them away. It was no use anymore. Nothing mattered anymore. Her weakness and her pain…she no longer had the strength to hide, not when _she_ always found a way to reopen the wounds in her heart. Until her chest tightened in pain and she couldn't breathe anymore. Until her world had been reduced to monochrome shades and the fairy tales she used to believe in had been turned to ashes. Miku was tired and drained.

"Come here…"

The voice was soft and so gentle that she almost didn't think it came from Luka. But there was no one else in the room. She stood her ground, trying to keep herself upright even as sobs wracked her body. The pink haired woman didn't raise her voice or repeat the command more forcefully as Miku had expected her to. Instead, she merely kept holding her gaze, with that same expression. The teal haired girl could tell that Luka still wasn't quite in her right mind, from the unfocused glaze in her eyes. But the expression on her face and the emotions she seemed to be trying to convey…they _felt_ real. With someone like her, Miku could never tell but in that moment, she chose to believe. Even if she was wrong and it was another lie, to add to the countless others, she'd still risk it; all for the chance of being right, all for a stolen and ephemeral kind of solace.

Slowly, she made her way across the room, careful not to trip over her own feet. Miku gingerly positioned herself close to the pink haired woman. The tension refused to leave her body, however, and her neurons flared into attention as Luka suddenly pulled her into an embrace. It wasn't the rough kind of touch she had been waiting for or the cruel smile and poisoned words she had been prepared to endure. Just a simple hug, yet it was enough to send her mind into a frenzy. An exhilarating feeling fluttered in her stomach and that was when she knew that she was addicted. She never had any chance of escaping after all.

"It's…nice isn't it? To be comforted by someone…you…care for…" Her voice was husky and low and it made Miku shiver in a not completely unpleasant way. But she still couldn't wrap her mind around the sudden change in temperament in her 'lover'. Luka was never like this and Miku felt even more despaired as she realized she could never fully trust the woman or the facades she displayed. "Must be nice…not that I'll ever have the chance to experience…such a feeling."

Miku didn't understand what Luka had meant. For someone like her, love must come easily. By the time the teal haired girl had thought to ask, it was too late. Luka's arms were limp around her, having fallen asleep with her face buried in Miku's hair. She could've probably left then and there. The pink haired woman was a deep sleeper and she'd been around long enough to know how not to wake her. Still, she stayed. Because somewhere, deep within her, she knew that there was something precious about the words they had exchanged today. Those meaningless and anger fuelled phrases that she couldn't really comprehend…behind them was a part of Luka she would likely never see again. So she knelt there, motionlessly, occasionally taking the liberty to stroke the light pink hair that had so entranced her the first time they met. Time seemed to have grinded to a halt and Miku couldn't remember the exact moment when she too had fallen asleep.

* * *

When morning came, she had already left. That was also routine for the both of them. It was nothing new for Luka to leave without a word. Miku barely felt anything at the realization anymore. Yet as she sat up, she noticed something strange. She was in the main bedroom and not on the couch where they had drifted off the day before.

A blanket was covering her. That also hadn't been there earlier. Miku bit her lip and wrapped the thing closer around her, unable to believe that Luka had been the one to do this for her. Her life was barely spared most days and here she was supposed to believe that the woman was trying to _take care of her?_ Not even her past self would have easily believed in such a tantalizing lie…even if somewhere, deep within her heart, she knew that it was the truth.

She wouldn't admit it. She couldn't. Because acknowledging the fact that Luka still had some sort of human emotion she could connect with gave her too much hope. And with hope came a soul clenching fear; an overwhelming, cowardly sensation that clung to these optimistic feelings with an unhealthy fervour. The more she stood to gain, the more she dreaded to lose and Miku couldn't have that. Not again. She couldn't take any more.

At this point, she would rather not be loved because love scared her. It was uncertain and unpredictable, much too different from the concrete existence of the contract between them. And no matter how much she wanted it to be different, Miku knew that that was all there would ever be. After all, Luka had said as much to her, their first time together.

' _I hope you understand that there will never be anything ridiculous, such as love out of this relationship.'_

Her voice had been sickeningly sweet as she whispered the very words that destroyed Miku for the very first time. She had seemed triumphant and unmoved as she felt the teal haired girl shake and crumble under her fingertips. Heartlessly, she had moulded and manipulated Miku into becoming an unfeeling puppet and then cruelly laughed every time the puppet strained to rediscover its emotions. Those weren't things she could easily forget.

The blanket was warm and cozy around her, so Miku snuggled in even deeper. She had no way to get to school and no desire to go either. Instead, she pretended that the comforting embrace was Luka's arms around her again. She could almost hear that deep voice whispering affectionate words to her. That voice she loved so much when it wasn't filled with contempt or derisive amusement.

The warm morning sunlight seeped into the room, forcing Miku's eyes open. Tears misted her vision and she stopped pretending.

She wasn't fooling herself. She wasn't fooling anyone. Even innocuous fantasizing of such things eroded her now, burning her insides with a throbbing pain. In one swift motion, she threw aside her covers and staggered into the bathroom. The reflection in the mirror showed a pale girl with marks all over, colouring her almost translucent skin. Black and blue and streaks of red scratches across the smoothness of her young body…this was reality. Lifting her hand, Miku observed the fresh bruises left from yesterday and closed her eyes at the sight. How could she have let herself fall back into that trap again? How many times had she told herself to stop believing? How many times had she tried to stay conscious of the truth?

It wasn't her first day with Luka after all…she wouldn't succumb again.

* * *

A loudly slammed door announced the pink haired woman's return that night. And for the first time, Miku welcomed the breathtaking adrenaline that drilled through her as derogatory words filled her ears and unforgiving palms left stinging contusions on her body. Any trace of the Luka who had fallen asleep on her the day before was gone. She was back to her usual harsh and calculating games, yet the teal haired girl felt something akin to relief. It was much better this way, she thought, gritting her teeth against the painful fingers constricting her throat. Black spots dotted her vision as she slowly lost consciousness. Miku didn't struggle, even as her coughing spasms began fading into shallow gasps.

 _Her_ hands were warm… _so warm_ …but she was glad searing pain was the only thing that consumed her.

Because she had known from the very beginning hadn't she?

What they had could never be love.

* * *

 **A/N:**

So...this was heavily inspired by a few fics I read somewhere else and just...I really had to write it. Lots of cameos in there and I wrote characters I don't usually include so that's a plus?

Some of the story is very clunky though because I'm not used to having so much world-building to do. And wow, this hurts more than I thought it would...welp~

Reviews are always welcome :'3

Honestly, I never thought I'd write a oneshot this long so tell me what you guys think...


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